I spent last night wide awake until 3 a.m. What was I doing, you ask? I couldn't sleep, so I was outlining my life from 2004 until the present for the book I'm going to write. No lie! Actually, I see the book ending in July 2010, when this whole chapter (no pun intended) of my life, I mean JOURNEY, ends with a wedding.
That's right! Save the date - July 10, 2010. There's going to be a wedding.
Back to the book. I was up last night experiencing every emotion from hatred to bliss. Reliving lots of events that have triggered a wide-range of hijinx and stories. I went from bouts of crying to hysterical laughter (my hotel neighbors think I'm a nut, I'm sure). And when I think about all of the crap and funny things I've been through since I came out, I've got quite a story to tell...I think.
The good and the bad news is that all of my faithful readers will be part of the book - Marla Makins, Kacia Larbee, Lange Grill...and so on. Start thinking about who you'd like to play you in the big screen version of the adaptation - I've already picked Minka Kelly for the young KAM and Kate Winslet for the more mature one. :)
Any good titles for the book? Or individual chapters you know need to be included?
Chapter 1 - {sing} You picked a fine time to leave me Lesley...you bitch, you slut
Chapter 11 - DeAnnoying, DeDumb, DeDrivamecrazy DeAlmostsisterinlawifyougaveourrelationshipanycredence
Chapter 15? - Best Day of My Life - July 10, 2010
Who knows what will happen, but I've always wanted to write a book and I feel in some way I've gone through all of this stuff for a reason...(outside of you, Lanae).
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7 comments:
I'm especially fond of Chapter 11 - but can you do chapter 1 and 11 as removable (tear out) chapters so we can include a book burning ceremony as part of the wedding weekend festivities? (Complete with chanting and dancing around the fire -- clothing optional! :)~
Chapter 2: All That Matters (a tribute to the people who love me for who I am)
Ashley Judd as Marla please!
XOXO
P.S. I didn't think there could be a book as inspirational as "Are you There God? It's me Margret" but you just might be on to something!!(as long as you include when you got your first period - perhaps that could go in the prologue :)~
Given all the people who have felt it necessary to write a book on themselves, I think you are entitled to write one yourself. I'm not sure who should play me in the movie, but obviously it has to be someone extremely good looking and witty.
KAM....not only do your hotel neighbors think you're crazy, my roommates think I am as well! I was laughing out loud at the title of Chapter 1 and then feeling like an idiot for it taking me a nanosecond to understand DeChapter 11!!!! The only thing missing is the obvious chapter on the oh so incredible, hears everything, asks too many personal questions future sister-in-law. That's right. I want my own chapter as well....never mind; I'll take #15 and just make that day about me as well; I'm good at that!
And good grief, just say their names would ya? I didn't even know who Marla was until I read it a second time. "Who is this Marla friend", I wondered. "Why does Karla care who portrays this Marla chick", I pondered. "Why has Lange never mentioned her", I queried. (That's right...I've met Lange!) In my defense, it's 1AM so cut me some slack!
Clearly there is no one in Hollywood who could accurately capture my essence, so I would play me. Then I would turn into a HUGE HUGE star!
I would like the chapter where you introduce me to be called "To the Window, to the Wall..."
Thank you and good day!!!
Awwww...skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet.
If you do that drop low thing at the "back, back, back it up" part of the song, you could become a HUGE star. I will allow you your breakout role.
Ashley Judd...hmmmm...I really don't like her. I think she's got a screw loose. We'll go with Faith Hill.
For Amy....Gillian Anderson
For Lanae...Jessica Biel
For Karen...Toni Collette (she'd win the Oscar if Kate Winslet doesn't)
For Kristin...Julianne Moore
For Dacia...she'd insist on Sharon Stone.
Alright. I guess I can SETTLE for Faith Hill (that beautiful, talented, skinny bitch...) if I must. ANYTHING for YOU KAM!! (But then I must insist that we find a role for her yummy little husband as well....there's just something about that hat....)
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